Ramblings

I spent the night at the South African’s place the other night, and when I woke up I took a shower. But, the South African had run out of white people shampoo. The only shampoo the South African had available was “specially formulated for women of color,” a census group I don’t entirely belong to. I decided to use it since I had no other option, and to my surprise it worked great! So much better than that miserable lye and hog fat mixture they sell to white people. My hair is no longer frizzy and tangled. It is silky and smooth, with a glimmering shine. For the first time in my life, my hair doesn’t look like I just got out of football practice. I’m going to buy a bottle and use it everyday.While I was showering I thought it would be great if I had been carrying around a showering tool belt with me at all times, just in case I got stuck and had to spend the night somewhere. It would have all of my toiletries conveniently located around my waist. This belt would be water-proof, that way I could just wear it directly into the shower. What could be easier?

Of course, this is an idiotic idea, coming from a person who’s full of them. I’m a little obsessed with Unuseless Japanese Inventions, and still spend a lot of time flipping through my big bento box of them. They never get old, and there always seems to be new ones I haven’t seen before. I’ve wanted to put some serious time into making a few unuseless inventions myself, but I have discovered that inventing isn’t a skill of mine. The showering tool belt is the closest I’ve ever gotten to success after many brainstorming sessions. I might naturally have the hair of a woman of color, but no matter how hard I try I’ll never possess the unuseless ingenuity of the Japanese.

I give unuseless Japanese inventions a score of 93,789 out of a possible 100,000.